I couldn't have asked for a better birthday present two weeks ago. I had the routine 12 week appointment at my ob/gyn and got to hear the heartbeat for the first time! A beautiful sound and a strong 164 beats per minute. It was truly one of the most amazing and unforgettable experiences I'll ever have in my entire life, I'm sure. Friends of mine told me how emotional it would be, but I didn't anticipate the wave of absolute relief I'd have, while at the same time utter elation. I couldn't hold back the tears. Even though you've known you've been pregnant for months at this point, nothing can prepare you for how you'll feel after hearing the actual sound of the heartbeat. It all starts coming together...all the months of trying and not knowing if this month was going to be your month...it was all worth it in the end...this little miracle growing each day and depending on you for nutrients and a cozy place to call home for 9 months.
I have to admit I was a little aprehensive about the appt. at first, even though I was also really excited at the same time. You can't help but think about stories you hear about women who are going along fine in the pregnancy, but bam! 12 weeks hits and suddenly your life changes without warning...and in a bad way...the dreaded miscarriage. No one wants to know what that's like. I know a few people recently who have had miscarriages. Everyday I feel so blessed to have this baby growing inside me...it's already such a big part of my and my husband's life...so innocent, precious, and special.
Next big milestone...week 20 (first week in June) we'll be able to find out the gender of the baby. Either way we'll be ecstatic..but we both have an inuition that it's going to be a all things pretty and nice...sugar and spice...that's what little girls are made of. We shall see though. :)
Other small notes: I am officially into my second trimester. Morning nausea has surpassed and I'm feeling great. Spring break was spent in Florida - laying out on the beach was a new experience. Not just because I won't look flattering in a bathing suit for much longer and I'm beginning to fight with the buttons on my pants, it was funny seeing my pelvis area lop sided. I put my hand under my belly button a few inches, and what do you know? What felt like a huge rock must be the baby! That was really neat. Now every morning I am cognizant about how much my uterus is growing and where the baby has moved to.
What I'm looking forward to most: Feeling the baby move in a couple weeks! I'll be so eager to share with all of you that amazing experience.
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
How New Moms Can Save Tons of Money Using Amazon!
I have to give major kudos to a fellow blogger, who is also going to be a first time mom. She has shared her secret to saving loads of money on diapers, wipes, and more for your baby! Click here to read her full post. Thanks for sharing Melissa! :)
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Baby Wipe Warmers, seriously people?
Has anyone else heard of such a thing? My best friend got 3 of these at her baby shower and I didn't even know about them. I think it's a little ridiculous to now take the time to heat up baby wipes so the diaper changing experience is more pleasant. I mean, come on. I hope I'm not insulting anyone, but really? Wipe warmers? What will they think of next! I just had to laugh at my friend. Of course you never know. Maybe some of you are thinking the joke is on me and I'll end up caving down the road and do anything to keep my baby from crying. We shall see, but I really think it's silly for now. I'm excited to find out what other little short cuts we've taken in baby stuff.
I am one to get excited about new things. For example, I think the travel system is great, the snap tray on high chairs you can now throw in the dishwasher. I'm all about making life easier and more convenient. But anyway else with me on this? haha. Too funny!
I am one to get excited about new things. For example, I think the travel system is great, the snap tray on high chairs you can now throw in the dishwasher. I'm all about making life easier and more convenient. But anyway else with me on this? haha. Too funny!
Saturday, February 12, 2011
On Cloud Nine!!!
Well I got my BFP this morning! We are expecting our first bundle of joy on October 23rd. We are thrilled and still in shock. Thank you for all the support, baby dust, love, and well wishes!! I am looking forward to sharing my pregnancy journey with you. More to come tomorrow. My husband and I are going out to celebrate tonight... this has been the BEST Valentine's weekend I could have ever dreamed of!
Sunday, February 6, 2011
A Rollercoaster of The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly
This is my second month of charting BBT and 7th month using opks. I figured this pregnancy thing was going to be pretty easy. Hah!! I quickly learned that the female body has a lot more tricks up her sleeves than I was lead on to believe. All those years on b/c pills, not knowing that DH and I would have a long journey of ups and downs throughout the months of ttc. It's funny how you spend all that time NOT trying to get pregnant, and then one day getting pregnant consumes your life. It's instantly becomes this conquest: everything you live for, breathe, and think about!
Despite this process being frustrating at times, joining forums like "baby center" has been a great way to vent and talk to women who are experiencing the same thing. And although we are all strangers, we quickly formed this incredible bond. These women are a great support system other. Even though I share these intimate details with my immediate family and closest friends, they don't always know what it feels like to want something so badly. It's hard sometimes hearing, "Relax." or "It'll happen when the time is right." That's when you feel like saying, okay, more like screaming..."When will it be my turn?!"
I'm getting a little ahead of myself.
DH and I started ttc back in June of 2010. All was optimistic and hopes were high. Boy, were we naive. I mean, it seemed easy, right? How hard was it? All we had to do was time baby dancing right? Our best friends got pregnant the first month! Well, after a few months of very long 41 day cycles, I started to get the gut feeling that this was not going to be easy for us. I went to my ob/gyn in August and the dreaded response from my doctor was that I needed to give it a full year and try to be more patient. Well, one more month of patience, and I wasn't going to sit around and wait for nothing to happen. I know my body, and I sensed that I'd need a little help. That's when I went back to the ob/gyn in Oct. and was diagnosed with PCOS (polycystic ovary syndrome). I won't get into details behind it because all the hormones and physiology of it all is quite confusing. Basically, I had cysts around my ovaries, which the nurse described as beautiful. To paraphrase: "Oooh! How pretty! Your ovaries look like a 'string of pearls.'" Come to find out, not ten min. later from my doctor, that this is in fact a bad sign--that I'd have difficulty becoming pregnant. Apparently, someone needs to inform the nurse of PCOS. I also learned that my blood work came back normal, except that I had high estrogen. This meant that I wasn't ovulating. And if you don't ovulate, you don't release that "golden" egg to allow the sperm to fertilize it.
Wow. That was a shot to the soul. I felt like all the love of potentially experiencing motherhood was sucking the life out of me. I felt like my heart broke into a million pieces and I didn't have any control! If you knew me, you'd know how much I need control in my life. To say that I can be a little OCD with organization and cleaning would be an understatement if you asked my husband. I'm also a teacher, so you know how controlling teachers can be too. Truly, we have to be for the most part. Kids need structure and routine, which is what we as adults need too in our lives.
I know now how dramatic this all may sound, especially if you're been diagnosed with PCOS yourself, then you probably feel like you can already call yourself a doctor, that is, if you use webmd and such. Lol. But at the time of hearing this news, I was absolutely devastated. First thing I did: cry all the way to work. Probably should have taken the day off, but sometimes going to work makes you forget about life's problems. It was a temporary distraction. Second thing I did as soon as I had time to think about it again: google PCOS like crazy! I had to find out almost everything there was to know about it.
In the end, I found out that 10% of women are diagnosed with PCOS and it doesn't mean you're infertile or can't have kids. I learned that I'd just need a little help from fertility meds like metformin and clomid. The meds definitely helped and the results were positive. I went from 41 day cycles to 32 day cycles! That was exciting.
There's almost always a BUT. After a few more months of BFN Hpts, I was beginning to feel defeated again. I hadn't found the perfect amount of miracle drugs or the quick fix that I had anticipated at this point. I was ready to see an RE (reproductive endocronologist), otherwise known as a fertility specialist.
Currently, that's where my DH and I are. We went through this past cycle without any clomid (stayed on metformin) and we both had lots of testing done. I had my HSG (funny story for another day), CD3 utltrasound, and a couple of rounds of bloodwork done. It all sounds overwhelming at first, but all of this actually meant we were steps closer to getting answers, and more importantly, conceiving.
DH and I are keeping our fingers crossed that this month we actually won't have to do anymore testing or take meds. I got my +opk, my temps look great at 7 DPO, and it'd be such a beautiful gift to have a BFP on Valentine's Day (when AF is due). Here's a pic of my +opk on the right (day after my hubby's birthday). Such an exciting day! Plus, they say your chances of getting pregnant after having an HSG is much higher.
Stay tuned to symptoms over the next week, the second half of the dreaded 2 ww. I say dreaded because remember, usually the second half is scary for women with fertility issues. If the BBTs start going downhill, which the tend to do during this time if the egg isn't fertilized and progesterone levels fall. That means that ugly AF is on her way. In these instances, I wish my uterus had a sign that said "Closed" or "Wrong way. Turn around the go back!"
Guilty Confession: DH and I went "browsing" through baby stores this weekend and bought some stickers to start a baby scrapbook to chronicle the nine months of pregnancy, when in fact I do become pregnant. We're just so excited..we can't help it. Needless to say, after all the bad news, comes good news eventually. We're praying for our little miracle and little pumpkin. Our EDD is October 24th if we conceive this month. I pray we'll experiencen the joy of parenthood soon...
Despite this process being frustrating at times, joining forums like "baby center" has been a great way to vent and talk to women who are experiencing the same thing. And although we are all strangers, we quickly formed this incredible bond. These women are a great support system other. Even though I share these intimate details with my immediate family and closest friends, they don't always know what it feels like to want something so badly. It's hard sometimes hearing, "Relax." or "It'll happen when the time is right." That's when you feel like saying, okay, more like screaming..."When will it be my turn?!"
I'm getting a little ahead of myself.
DH and I started ttc back in June of 2010. All was optimistic and hopes were high. Boy, were we naive. I mean, it seemed easy, right? How hard was it? All we had to do was time baby dancing right? Our best friends got pregnant the first month! Well, after a few months of very long 41 day cycles, I started to get the gut feeling that this was not going to be easy for us. I went to my ob/gyn in August and the dreaded response from my doctor was that I needed to give it a full year and try to be more patient. Well, one more month of patience, and I wasn't going to sit around and wait for nothing to happen. I know my body, and I sensed that I'd need a little help. That's when I went back to the ob/gyn in Oct. and was diagnosed with PCOS (polycystic ovary syndrome). I won't get into details behind it because all the hormones and physiology of it all is quite confusing. Basically, I had cysts around my ovaries, which the nurse described as beautiful. To paraphrase: "Oooh! How pretty! Your ovaries look like a 'string of pearls.'" Come to find out, not ten min. later from my doctor, that this is in fact a bad sign--that I'd have difficulty becoming pregnant. Apparently, someone needs to inform the nurse of PCOS. I also learned that my blood work came back normal, except that I had high estrogen. This meant that I wasn't ovulating. And if you don't ovulate, you don't release that "golden" egg to allow the sperm to fertilize it.
Wow. That was a shot to the soul. I felt like all the love of potentially experiencing motherhood was sucking the life out of me. I felt like my heart broke into a million pieces and I didn't have any control! If you knew me, you'd know how much I need control in my life. To say that I can be a little OCD with organization and cleaning would be an understatement if you asked my husband. I'm also a teacher, so you know how controlling teachers can be too. Truly, we have to be for the most part. Kids need structure and routine, which is what we as adults need too in our lives.
I know now how dramatic this all may sound, especially if you're been diagnosed with PCOS yourself, then you probably feel like you can already call yourself a doctor, that is, if you use webmd and such. Lol. But at the time of hearing this news, I was absolutely devastated. First thing I did: cry all the way to work. Probably should have taken the day off, but sometimes going to work makes you forget about life's problems. It was a temporary distraction. Second thing I did as soon as I had time to think about it again: google PCOS like crazy! I had to find out almost everything there was to know about it.
In the end, I found out that 10% of women are diagnosed with PCOS and it doesn't mean you're infertile or can't have kids. I learned that I'd just need a little help from fertility meds like metformin and clomid. The meds definitely helped and the results were positive. I went from 41 day cycles to 32 day cycles! That was exciting.
There's almost always a BUT. After a few more months of BFN Hpts, I was beginning to feel defeated again. I hadn't found the perfect amount of miracle drugs or the quick fix that I had anticipated at this point. I was ready to see an RE (reproductive endocronologist), otherwise known as a fertility specialist.
Currently, that's where my DH and I are. We went through this past cycle without any clomid (stayed on metformin) and we both had lots of testing done. I had my HSG (funny story for another day), CD3 utltrasound, and a couple of rounds of bloodwork done. It all sounds overwhelming at first, but all of this actually meant we were steps closer to getting answers, and more importantly, conceiving.
DH and I are keeping our fingers crossed that this month we actually won't have to do anymore testing or take meds. I got my +opk, my temps look great at 7 DPO, and it'd be such a beautiful gift to have a BFP on Valentine's Day (when AF is due). Here's a pic of my +opk on the right (day after my hubby's birthday). Such an exciting day! Plus, they say your chances of getting pregnant after having an HSG is much higher.Stay tuned to symptoms over the next week, the second half of the dreaded 2 ww. I say dreaded because remember, usually the second half is scary for women with fertility issues. If the BBTs start going downhill, which the tend to do during this time if the egg isn't fertilized and progesterone levels fall. That means that ugly AF is on her way. In these instances, I wish my uterus had a sign that said "Closed" or "Wrong way. Turn around the go back!"
Guilty Confession: DH and I went "browsing" through baby stores this weekend and bought some stickers to start a baby scrapbook to chronicle the nine months of pregnancy, when in fact I do become pregnant. We're just so excited..we can't help it. Needless to say, after all the bad news, comes good news eventually. We're praying for our little miracle and little pumpkin. Our EDD is October 24th if we conceive this month. I pray we'll experiencen the joy of parenthood soon...
A little inspiration...
"Hope is the companion of power, and mother of success; for who so hopes strongly has within her the gift of miracles." ~ Samuel Smiles
"The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen, nor touched, but are felt with the heart." ~ Helen Keller
"Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking outside your body." ~Elizabeth Stone
"When two hearts beat together, the third one is conceived." ~WhiteRacoon
My fortune cookie a couple weeks ago, has to be a good sign, right?
"Smile and rejoice, fortune is smiling on you."
"The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen, nor touched, but are felt with the heart." ~ Helen Keller
"Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking outside your body." ~Elizabeth Stone
"When two hearts beat together, the third one is conceived." ~WhiteRacoon
My fortune cookie a couple weeks ago, has to be a good sign, right?
"Smile and rejoice, fortune is smiling on you."
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